sprained my ankle running for the bus.
it is getting all big and swollen... i imagine it will be a lovely shade of blue tomorrow.
i am all hobbley.
it sucks.

lovely evening with ryan and sandy, drank some great wine and ate chinese food
and now i am sore and tired and needing my bed badly.

what a day...

6.8
mmmm
big fatty tremblement du terre.

just had a big (6.2+)earthquake.
our offices have cracks in the wall and water is pouring into the entry way... so i went home. traffic was suprisingly light. very relieved that the bridges are ok.

wow. invigorating. i am a fan of natural disaster and that gave me my fill for a while. couldn't we have just had some big winds or something.

my immediate thought was that Rainer was blowing. which would be the shit hitting the fan.
had books and cds all over the floor and the cats are freaked.
i can hear fire trucks and other sirens periodically.

20 minutes till work departure.
i have sat down to write a couple times now, but have always self edited.
what's the deal? hmmm.

talked to lotsa ladies already this morning. good thing i can call them all early.
mom is now evaluating what she needs to get done before she takes her big leap overseas, maria is excitedly buying lonely planet guides to the middle east, and sarah... not to be outdone... is planning to bike down the pacific coast from bellingham to LA... whew. the lovely jen is in a furnitureless apartment in SF getting ready to go to london.

hmmm. do you feel as boring as me?

i am psyched for sarah. I actually tried to bike from seattle to san francisco back in 1996, but only made it half way before i was stricken with malaria (picked up undoubtedly while i was passed out on a beach in honduras on new years of that year, but that is another story). I have always said that i wanted to complete my trip... and finish the bandon-sf leg of it. I am considering tagging along with sarah. I have a long way to go to get in as good as shape as she is though. that means riding to work. ugh. i know i can do it if i just start...but it is the first couple of times that i dread. i am a big wimpodite.

lebanon at christmas! yah. the peters family can restart the tradition of visiting ancient runes on the holidays, which was the bane of my youth... but in retrospect was incredible. Hanging in Carthage, Dougga, Utica, El Djem and other roman/punic/phoenican outposts in africa is definitely a trip...

been up too long, got lots on my mind.

must sleep
have no strength to go on.
nice night out with my friend lin
who i haven't hung with in ages.
2 glasses of wine and i am

o
u
t....

i love the gentle coelacanth.

i am a monkey
don't tell anyone.
shhhhh

up too early with a cat in my face demanding that she be fed. fed her. checked mail. back to bed for 20 minutes till i faced the inevitable. to the shower. i have been cleansed. now the big decision is to write or do some 5:30 am grocery shopping. i will manage both i suppose.

dreaming about a big vacation. bigger than any i got planned right now. i could use a month on a beach in some interesting local (rhodes? maybe there is someplace in lebanon for me?) where i could forget that i have all this stuff, and all that i feel obligated to get done. am i turning into my pops? have i already turned?

a big vacation by myself. someplace fairly well travelled and hot. someplace where i can have a drink in the middle of the day. a place where i can sit down with a stranger and bum a smoke, just to make conversation, ignoring the fact that i don't smoke. a place that can both over and underwhelm me in the space of a day.

ok. so basically i want to go back to roatan in 1995.

dreamer.

it's coming...
been working on this thing since september last year (with lots and lots of help).
bit like birthing really. today i was told that i should have a postpartum, stead of a postmortem.
sounds good to me. the one thing i do know is that i am going to have a
colossal drunk on the evening of the 12th.

had a good talk with jonny action this weekend.
he got mugged at gun point on his birthday.
makes me want to smack some assholes in chicago.

the bloggy thing makes me miss my friends more, but i got to admit it is nice to see snippets of their lives. I can read and dream that we had the time and the place to be together. i guess this is just something we have to deal with our big world being made smaller by technology.

awwww

ok i take it back.
mom isn't going to dhaka.

YAY!

i didn't want her to go anyway.

just talked to linda. so i missed a good party. not the first time, surely won't be the last at the rate that i am hermitting up.
i went and saw hannibal today and it was terribley dissapointing. i got up in the middle of it and went and caught the end of the current chris rock flick... which ended bad... so i went and saw the end of hannibal... which was boring. now i am at home...just finished the rivers edge, which i have never seen but always wanted to. and just started the Freshman with matthew brodrick and marlon brando.

my kingdom for someone to hang with.

i am neckid underneath these clothes.

ah.. the blog is once again functional.
i was starting to get desperate. oh yeah, i live in desperation.

from gone fishing by walter mosley

Early morning is the best time. You're fully rested but not awake enough to remember how hard it all is. Morning is like being a child again, and morning before the sun is out is like those magic times that you hid under the bed and in between the clothing hanging in your mother's closet. Time when any kind of miracle could come about just as normal as a spider making her web.

lazy weekend.

don't think i am going to make it to portland tonight.
though i want to be there with all my heart... specially to chat and hang out with linda
i really don't think it is going to happen. linda is a phone buddy who keeps me real.
who calls me on my shit. we drink wine together (on the phone) and whine about our
sorry lives. the thing that made me love linda so much... she knew just what to say
after my father died. bing. she is a very special friend... and crackerjack on issues of
mining law and such.

i think i am going to be lazy and do nothing today. tonight i will get back on here and laugh at the notion that i thought i could do nothing... but that is my stated goal. another goal is to hang around so i can be a sounding board for maria to discuss school options for next year... as of this morning norway, indonesia and beirut are duking it out.

non-goals for today are:
taxes
flexible spending accounting
anything of great importance that would give me a feeling of accomplishments.

*news flash* maria is going to beirut, lebanon.

ok. mixed reviews.
happy cause i just got back from a fucking AWESOME lecture given by a friend of my grandfathers down at CYC. He spoke and showed slides of circumnavigating vancouver island. (300 miles long, over 2000 miles of coastline, largest island on the west coast.) He showed pictures from a trip he and his wife took in 2000 to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversy, as well as pictures of sailing it in 1971. the cast of characters included three of his children in young and old views, bears, and old norweigan guy named russell who could fix any boat. a couple stories about running aground. some veiled references to a poem entitled "daring dick and the dangling dinghy" (his name was dick, the poem was written after him) and stories of old, old but lovely sealions. It was great to see my grandparents in their element. I love my grandparents in big ways.

speaking of family... i also chatted with my mar in dc. she got an offer from a little oil company school in indonesia that pays pretty good, has an interview with madrid tomorrow, has a pretty much offer from a school in norway.... ummm and i think my mom is gonna go to bangladesh.... arrrrggghhhhhh...... Joe & Tara Help! whaddya think... should she do it....??? damn. of. all. the. places....

friday night alone at home. (cept for the miao-miaos) .

that was the good part of the day.

all day offsite management type meeting.

these things are always both interesting and frustrating.
and all to often very revealing.
it'll make for an interesting friday.

not feeling very typey this morning. very tired even though i didn't do a thing last night. just crashed hard. woke up briefly when jen called i think i was pretty bumbley on the phone. smacking walls and tripping over my pants. to my bed and warm feline friends... ohhhh... i think i am gonna go lay down for five minutes.

hmmmmmm my ma and seester, maria, are at a conference for hiring teachers to work overseas. they have interview with schools in interesting places like this. hot diggity dog. curiously... the following places are looking for technology teachers coordinators whatevers....
perth australia
vienna
dhaka
brussels
hongkong
santadomingo
quito
alexandria egypt
cairo
paris
munich
bombay
madrid
london
vietnam

very curious....

showered.
hey,
by the way... with the addition of the blogvoices addition to this site, i have removed that ugly bulletin board from sneakyfreak.



can i kick it?

ahhh the 6:00 am typey typey.

did nothing last night. chris stopped by the house after work and we hung out for a while. most of the time was spent handing the phone back and forth talking to d-man in baltimore. i really wish (and so do the mccarthy's) that they lived closer. it was really nice when i could go down to portland and crash on their floor.

ended up sleeping half the night away on the couch. this is becoming a regular part of my life. it wouldn't be so bad if it was a little more comfortable. as it is my couches are leftover dorm furniture form western washington university... circa 1955... that my folks aquired in the 60s when my pops was an RA there. ugly and functional... but a bit to short for long assed i.

dr. yesterday: upped my prednisone to 20/10 mg (20 one day, 10 the next) with a normal taper. also got a bunch of blood drawn to measure immuran levels in my red blood cells, also got a big shot of vit b-12. yum. supper. the prednisone actually works pretty quick and i ate some rice and left over pork yesterday. i am feeling lots better but still should proceed slowly.

I had a great visit with josh the other night where he was busted out the story of jethrow from the old books of the bible. inspired, of course, by the ultra religious jethrow tull (sitting on a park bench, eyeing little girls with bad intent). it is great to have josh around and i will be very sorry if he and tal decide to move out of seattle after they have their baby. of course this will just add another reason to travel to NY or israel. Josh reminds me of kids i grew up with overseas.... brash, interesting, funny... with excellent historys and adventures to recount. I got my fingers crossed that his photography business takes off. He deserves it. I think his portraits are amazing.

work: i am wound tight waiting for something to go wrong. i am starting to stick my nose in the test version of the product and then running around trying to solve whatever problem i find. it will be good to revise this product again for next year. give me a month and an engineer and a production person and i could hone that thing sharp. as it is i will be doing a lot of starting from scratch next year. a different challenge, a bigger one.... i just have to think of the lesson that netscape learned from the evil empire: sometimes you are better off if you just start over and leave your legacy behind. (ie 1.0, competing on internet time ).... dropping science like galileo dropped his orange.

waiting for a ride homey home.

the place. i belong. on the westside.
somebody please. take me home.

i come across in the morning when i'm tired
joely joel hauls my butt cross the lake
looking out the window got a feeling that i should be going
the other way. the other way...

take me home. joely joel. to the place.
i belooooooonnnnnng. Capitol Hill...
yechy eastside... let me go... to my hooommme.

to be sung to a john denver tune.

just doing my part.

there is a spider crawling around my desk and monitor.
he is an early morning guy like me. Hola, little buddy. under normal circumstances i would transfer him to my terrarium in the kitchen... but he looks so at home walking all over my bills and unanswered postcards that i am going to leave him be. just don't want to get him too close or i might accidently squish him in the dark.

i had a great evening with dave last night. we didn't even bother with the movie.. just sat around and chatted about his and marcie's honeymoon in thailand, work, life, love, tender feelings, our emotions and other manly things. dave is one of my favorite people. I worked with him at the evil empire and at apex. he is not of evergreen, but so much is that it doesn't matter. he always has a big hug and smile ready. plus he is an awesome adventurous cook and a big sweaty dancer. i fed him yummy pork and rice as i sucked down a couple of ensures. great evening.

dr. appt at 9:00 this morning. yay! hopefully we can manuever a quick fix for my current nastieness. i feel like i have been teetering on the edge of sick without really sinking into the depths of it. a little morning nausea, normal bloating and ass weirdnesses, weak and sleepy, little fevers here and there. i don't recommend it. gut illnesses are weird and fucked up. you think you can deal with them until you really know you can't. and by the time you realize it you are sicker than you should be. everybody i know with IBD or crohn's is the same way. we try to control our pain by diet, we try to control our stress levels, we go off of our medicine when we think we are safe, we get grumpy at the people we love when we can't deal with it. we accept the mood swings of prednisone as our god given right. growl. at least i have a good excuse to lay around in the bathtub. I dream of the day that i have a hot tub. When i do i will often be found... sitting in the hot hot water, under the rain, sipping on a full liquid diet. 300 calories a can, baby.

i am getting excited by my end of march. i am going to meet my friend kristen (kbq) in las vegas for a few days of general goofieness. i want to go for a hike out in the desert. hmmmm sitting here thinking about it all my references to las vegas are all literary. douglas coupland and hunter s. thompson. they are all about burying steroids in the desert and eating lots of drugs in hotel rooms. kbq, my dear, i will be your samoan. kristen is amazing and is more than filling in my planning deficits. she is arranging hotel and probably a general schedule. which is good cause my usual mode of operation is go and see what happens... i can always crash at a bus station if i need to. you would think at 30 that i would be getting over that... but no. old travel habits die harder than the rest. after las vegas i am going to make my way to san francisco to help jen enjoy her last week or so in the US before heading to jolly ol' london. i think we are going to roadtrip back up the coast to sea-town stopping to deliver stuff to storage in oregon. i vote for 101... hopefully the whales will still be migrating past the coast and we can catch some. I will bring my binoculars. maybe i can convince her to camp for a night at oswalds west state park, a yummy surfing spot on the oregon coast.

i just found a list of products and projects that i have worked on in the past... websites and applications. it was funny because i have forgotten many of them... i have been at apex for over 2 1/2 years now and it dominates my work memory. it is the first time and place where i really l-o-v-e my jobby job. hmmmm.... pagemaker 6.0, airgroup.com, atl.com, thecommunique.com, deathtax.com, emeritus.com, horizon air, entertainment tonight online, kavu.com, encarta, flight sim, ms creative writer and fine artist (haven't heard anything bout those in a while...wonder if they are still being made...very cool kids stuff), powerpoint, windows printer systems, ms works (gag), premera.com....

damn, almost looks like i have done something professionally with myself.

i stink. to the shower.

hey i just figured out that i can have ensure home delivered via ensure.com. i (heart) the fucking internet.

Good morning world!

i really dig the gallery. mmmmm mmmmm goodness.
herf.

waiting for mr. reeck to come over. today he called me avuncular and i almost smacked him. not really. or if i had it would be a verbal spanking. we are gonna get a movie and i am feeding him pork. the other white meat. the king of food. i don't know why the cow was ever invented, because the pig is clearly superior.

i am already starting to experience the sleepies.

smack me one time. smack me two times.

oh yeah, well take that!

i also pulled a bunch of frank herbert books out of that box.

of course on my way back to bed i noticed a trend and have to write it down. basically that orson scott card and brian herbert are both engaged in going back to their existing stories/novel/legacy pieces and adding new dimensions to them. in house harkonnen we get a new history of the dune saga, and in ender's shadow we get a retelling of ender's game from new perspective. how george lucas.

i got to get some sleep.

good 4 am, loyal fans.
ok.. so it isn't good. i just squashed my leg on the bottom of my desk.
it's not like i really have anything interesting to say... except that i get to talk to my doctor today
and that is a good thing. hmmmm tuesday. speaking of tuesdays... this weekend is the krewe of aphrodite
mardi gras celebration down in p-town. i am going to try to go down for it. though i don't expect to do tons of partying. more like spend some time with my friend linda, tia, ab, ilene and the rest of the portland world, hang with my little sisters and wish denis and kate and calvin still lived down there.

i am anxious for d-man to put up more pictures of calvin. Every time i talk to the McCarthys on the phone he is a gurgling yelling screaming laughing typhoon of noise in the background. It makes me very sad that i am not around him. he is the cutest and most wonderful thing ever.

babies. yum. so many of the lovely people in my life are starting families. now is when i really come into my own as weird uncle nick. i am officially half time jealous half time relieved. jealous because calvin is the neatest and relieved because i get to go home and hand him back. i keep thinking about the adage "he who laughs last, laughs loudest" and i know that i am eventually in deep doodoo, because i'm sure my day will come.

ok. i am going to go back and lay in bed and read and try to sleep. i picked up Ender's Shadow by orson scott card out of a box of books i am trying to give away and got sucked back in. So i will go have fun with that. It also forced me to go back through the box and remove all of the books by card that i thought i could live without. I know now that i was wrong. doomed to have to buy yet another bookshelf... or else do some rearranging. how does anyone ever sleep?

from the left side of the lake, signing off.

n.

my friend and old neighbor elizabeth made some incredible halibut for dinner tonight. it was delectable. delicious. damn good. first halibut of the season. it is starting to feel like spring. I actually saw a turtle sunning itself next to a great blue heron to day on the ride west across the lake. it is 9:00 and i am exhausted. je suis un big weenie. i used to be able to stay awake till 10:00.

added blogvoices so you can now respond to my posts.
gee, that was a productive way to spend my at-home time this morning.

here's the deal with crohn's:
because i am in prolonged, long drawn out ill rather than quick get sick then it's over in done with I end up having to still do the things i have to do when i feel well... like work and socialize... just with the added complexity of doing it sick (bloated, staying close to the restroom, cramps, loud guts, not eating and hungry). definitely not an easy task, but i did make it through college and to 30 fairly successfully. not fun either. so thats what i am faced with this morning. If the world was perfect and a kinder place I would get to stay in bed with a hot water bottle. It isn't.

trying not to be too stressed about it, cause that just makes things worse.


blech.

could somebody please send me into a corner for time-out?
i am tired of all of this...
the bills
being sick
being lonely
work frustrations
my messy house
laundry

basically i am being a big whiney baby.
unfortunately there is no one here to bore with my bitching
or maybe fortunately.

cept the fucking cats...and they don't feel like snuggling right now.

ahoy!
spent the day sailing on the Indian Summer with g'pa and matt
it was the first time my brother has been out on the boat in many many (15?) years. quite nice to have him come with us. he seemed to have a great time.

we raced and came in last, but didn't care. it was beautiful on the water. crisp feb weather. saw some porpoise and ate tuna sandwiches.

spent last night at the gs house. mom was there too. we went down to the yacht club and watched an interesting documentary about a big sea rescue in the south pacific. it shouldn't have, but it made me want to sail around the world in such a painful way. i don't think it is ever going to happen, mostly because i don't think i could live too far away from the wonders of western medicine for the time it would take... but the dream of months of solitude are very appealing. time for me and no one else. think of the piles of books i could read.

i am teetering on the edge of a flare-up of crohn's. the pain isn't bad right now, but i have been increasingly pukey and i am so used to the feeling that i know it's coming on. fuck. no fun. i spoke to the medical professionals on friday but didn't get a clear plan of attack... which means i get to sit it out till monday. wheeee.

chronic pain is a good teacher and i definitely wouldn't be who i am without it. it has taught me about mortality, limits, what in life is really important, and how to be (a) patient.

but shit, there has got to be better ways to build character.

snow still falling.
work still delayed.
(though i did go out for a winter wonderland walk and a bagel)

4-8 inches already around the city.
gee, shucks, looks like it is going to be awful difficult to get to work.
it's still coming down.

couldn't finish the movie.
it sucked. hard.

besides that...
snow is coming down on seattle. it looks like about an inch already with no sign of stopping. sea-town is lovely with a white layer. i think i may go out for a tromp in it. mmmm

i just made a big batch of soy tapioca
and watched Bring it On. Nothing like a movie about cheerleaders
to make me feel better.

2nd video looks even worse. appears to be a rip off Road Warriors
called Dune Warriors. cept instead of gas the baddies are after water, and they wear splendid codpieces.
swell. although it doesn't have Mel Gibson or Chistopher Walken (which all bad sci-fi flicks should), it does have David Carridine and a bunch of midgets... ummm i mean little people.

i am cultured. like yogurt.

listen and learn, grasshopper.

ill today.
so i worked remotely
cleaned the house (scrub tub, did all the dishes, clean bedroom)
went shopping and made a big pot of lentil veggie soup
yum. being sick sucks, but i do enjoy staying inside
with no reason to leave.

finished House Harkonnen. mmmmmm

now, time for a nap.

ugh.
got sick at work today. plus i was more exhausted than exhausted.
i need sleep.
it has been a weird week. i got this new night guard thing for my teeth so i don't grind
and wear down all my fabulous new gold, but having this thing in my mouth all night
has resulted in some very vivid dreams that, while not being nightmares, have
prevented the quality sleep i need.

that.. and i can't put down House Harkonnen by brian herbert. I am kind of a Dune junkie.
Fear is the mindkiller baby.

just went out for a piece of pie with brady and the lovely stephanie. then i let them raid my
boxes of give away books. They both left with large piles under their arms and enough reading
for a few weeks, and i got rid of some shit i gots to get rid of.

mmmmmm.... wish i was in somebody's arms for valenswine's eve.

but hey... at least i got ms. duckie

ON FEMININE NATURE
AND PUBLIC DECENCY

Spartan girls
are naked-thighed and man-crazy.

-Ibykos

home from a long day of work.
things fall apart... both chinua achebe and david byrne said this
and entropy is everything, baby.
(cept for that little thing called negentropy)
but anyway... today was a fall apart day
though i was able to wax and twine most of it together
so that all was not completely lost
we still have lots of fallout from mr. feb12th.

growl.

i am supposed to go out for dinner tonight
but not sure if i feel like dealing.
i am a lazy man.

spent the afternoon sleeping on the couch
about to take off on the nights adventures.

it is so nice to do nothing.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

Week of February 8, 2001

Would you ever convert to arborsexuality? Have your amorous misadventures with people made you so cynical about love that you'd consider an intimate relationship with a tree? After all, a tree will never leave you out on a limb. It won't bark at you for your faults or become impatient with how slowly you might be growing. But my advice is to hold off on this experiment for a little while longer, Taurus. Give human romance another chance. I predict that events in 2001 will rejuvenate the innocence of your attractions to two-legged, hot-blooded creatures. Get ready to see an omen to that effect this week.


hehhehehe
tree fucker.

long night
no sleep
lovely friends
and new people.
exhausted, ready for round 2
divine dancing and late night city wandering.
crash burn
return.

ok. i am happy now.
I called an old friend of mine who i haven't spoken to since 1984 who then hooked me up with another old friend. whew. wow.

here's the deal.
I tracked down Bruno who now lives in San Diego. We used to hang when we lived in Tunisia. What do I remember about Bruno. hmmm.. Bruno was a little wiry guy who drew comics and was fast. He had a great laugh which, when I heard it tonight, transported me back to 8th grade.

he is now married and has a two year old daughter. he does EEGs on drosophilia (sp? fruitflies, baby). I try to imagine him grown up but all i can envision is him at 14 playing soccer.

Bruno had Lorena's phone #. Lorena was another of our classmates. Lorena used to tease me when I was the worlds worst altarboy (shameful nicksecret, shhhhhhh). She and Glaucia Paula used to make faces at me during communion to make me laugh. Afterwards we would run around the garden behind the church and have rotten orange fights with all the other kids who didn't want to be at church. Lorena hails from Sweden and Mexico and pronounced cherokee, chur o key. stress on the key. so i called up and suprised her. Lorena is just about due to have her first baby. Everybody is so grown up.

so of course we are talking about having a little west coast reunion of sorts. I can't wait to see what develops.

we are almost mid-feb. this freaks me out.
why? you ask.

1. I have been working on a new version of AP Exam Review and it is going to ship rather soon. It is like... scheme, plan, write, schemeplanwrite, build, coordinate, be nice, explain myself, blahdy blah for the last 5 months with one goal in mind. Now it is going to come and go... and I suspect that I will still be in the same place. only a little wiser. this kind of pisses me of for some reason. I went and looked at salary.com and left work very mad. I am so petty, but the truth is pretty much the only thing that makes me not like my job is what i get paid. I guess I was too used to contracting.. though i haven't done it in close to 2.5 years. The raises were frequent and considerate.

2. I need to plan some vacation and the time for it is approaching. Sitting at home sick the last two day has just reinforced the fact that I need some sort of real vacation. This pisses me off... especially because i never seem to have any money (see complaint #1). I am planning a first visit to las vegas, but want to fit in San Francisco before Jen leaves for London, and New Mexico before too long. I also NEED to go to amsterdam to visit ms. tossey... who always ends up visiting me back here. Also LA to visit brandon.... too many friends living far away. that pisses me off and makes me sad. have i mentioned that i hate planning vacations. my druthers and usual practice is just to buy a ticket and go someplace. just go and do. when other people become involved the planning increases tenfold.

3. we haven't had a really good snow in the city this year. I woke up to snow and snow on the ground and wanted it to keep coming down until seattle is blanketed and the busses can't run and the foolish drivers are made even more foolish by the frozen streets. I want to sled down Republican or Pike on a garbage can lid. It never snows like it used to. nother sad face.

4. Dental Bills. ding. gotta pay to have gold teeth. shoulda never taken up skateboarding in my twenties.

i am a whiney baby. life is so good i could laugh. i am just copping a shitty attitude.

oh.. and then there is this weekend............ grin.

it is snowing.
Hurrah! there is less than an inch out there
but enough to make the roads slippery. it'll be a mess out there.
it is lovely though. everything is white and blanketed. delicious.
i want to go for a big ol' walk, but am instead off to bellevue and work. grrr

went
came home 2 hrs later.
fever-believer.

i am facing my big question of the day
to work or not to work?
i am still feeling a bit crap, but i have loads of stuff to work through,
my dilemma.

i'll probably go in for a while.
though i also should be figuring taxes and other assorted financial thingies.
my favorite.

ahhh but not yet.
kids in the hall is on.
heaven.

3 hr nap.
i bet i can do it again.

Day off work.
day in bed.

i actually like being sick. it is enforced slow down time. it is my body (with the help of some bug) telling me whoa. halt. chill out buddy.

here is how my body tells me to slow down:

1. malaria
2. Crohn's disease
3. broken jaw
4. la grippe
5. other assorted nastiness.

so today i am slow. I will attempt a meander over to Safeway or QFC for some gatorade^tm, some soy milk, and maybe some bread for toast.

i am a real live wire.

i know i am feeling ill when i don't have to change the channel
and mash is on. ugh.

at home on a monday afternoon with a flu thing coming on.
sitting in a cold conference room at work getting hot
and getting dizzy and decided that i ought not be there.

came home at 2 after wrapping some things up.
back to the couch. back to the tv.
also in the middle of Black Betty by Walter Mosely. good read. i am not much of a reader of mystery novels, but i am trying to explore new genres.

back to the couch...

my lazy weekend continues.

Today is my brother Matt's birthday. He is 32. Damn.
we had a great chat this morning. we always seem to get knee deep in techy shit.
he and Cathy are moving to chicago sometime this year and they are both very excited. I will be glad for another reason to go back to that town.

(some late breaking news to add to this. I found out today that I am gonna be an uncle. WHEEEEE HAAAA... now i have all kinds of reasons to go to chi-town.)

been on the computer and the couch since 6 this morning. i think i finally got in bed last night at 2. so nice to sleep on the couch. i am staring at the face of a grey and lazy day. oh oh . the phone ringeth.

still on the couch.
only moved to check my mail
and eat some frosted flakes.

lovely rough night
the busride home was a struggle to keep my drunkdrunk eyes open.
but i made it.

brandon's farewell party was kickass
we had it down at scott's gallery
martha put the whole thing together marvelously. a big crowd showed up and ohhhh
what fun. this morning my brain felt like a walnut rattling around in its shell.
ouch.

saturday with bad television.
on the couch with a blanket and duck keeping me
warm.

got a big ol' company meeting today
i wonder.com whats going down.
wouldn't be suprised by anything.

before that i am taking the morning off
to attend my first bris. wheeeeee
the new baby Tratt
is super cute and a little wrinkle faced still.
nice to have babies start to infiltrate our
community.

friday. ahhh. there has been about 15 inches of snow over the last
few days (in the mountains) and i really want to get my ass and my board
up there for some sliding. Brandito is in town briefly to pack up the remains
of his goods to take back down to LA tomorrow. which means we gots to
drink and such tonight. ahhh.

i feel like i am treading water
like i am struggling to keep my head up
and waiting for something big to happen.

from rob brezney

TAURUS

Be more like a wild horse and less like a golden retriever; more like a mysterious game with no time limit and less like a puzzle with several pieces missing; more like a song by P.J. Harvey and less like a movie by Ron Howard. Can you handle all of that, Taurus? For extra credit, try these tricks, too. Be more like a secret garden and less like a six-lane highway. Trust more in provocative information you don't fully understand, and speak less about the obvious facts you know all too well. Become more of the person your parents didn't want you to become and less of the person you fear you'll become.